They Will Pull You Down Bad Character Corrupts Good Morals

Hello, and welcome to Social Media Ministries. My name is Spencer Coffman. Thank you so much for tuning in with us today. We’ve got a great message for you.

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Today we are talking about the friends and the people that you choose to associate with. This is very very important. It not only reflects who you are as a person, but also what you’re doing in the eyes of God — as in who do you choose to build you up or pull you down?

Are you allowing people to influence you? Who is speaking into your life? Are they encouraging or are they toxic? The Word of God is sharp like a double-edged sword. It can pierce, dividing joints and marrow.

Are people using words to cut you down, or are they using the Word of God to pierce and build and encourage? You can use the Bible in ways to hurt people, or help people, depending on how you quote it and depending on how people look at you and what that’s a reflection of is inside of you.

The tongue is a fire set by Hell. We’ve got a whole sermon on it called, “The Tongue,” or “Reign In Your Tongue.” So check that out because what you say and the words you speak have power.

We want to make sure that what you put inside of you is the Bible. It’s hidden away in your heart. Why? So that you might not sin against God.

We’re going crazy with Scripture quotes right here, but the point is you need to put the Bible in you so that it comes out of you and the people around you need to be doing the same. And so if you’re associating with people who are ungodly, they don’t have the Bible in them, that’s going to affect you. Now of course, you need to go be a witness. We’re going to get into all of that.

You’ve got to bring the Bible to other people, but there’s a difference between bringing the Bible to someone and witness to them, and associating with them and being a part of that group. You can go witness to a drug dealer, or people can preach Alcoholics Anonymous, or drug addicts anonymous, whatever they’re calling it now, to people who are addicts without becoming an addict themselves.

Similarly, you can preach the Bible, the good news to sinners without becoming a sinner yourself. After all, it’s not the healthy who need a doctor, it’s the sick. Doctors don’t go to sick people and then intentionally get sick. They don’t associate with sick people all the time to become sick. They’re trying to help them.

And then it’s a line of do not let that rub off on you. So we’re going to get into this. You need to be very very careful when choosing your friends. Let’s go to the Bible, Proverbs 12:26, “A righteous person is cautious in friendship but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”

So if you want to be righteous, you need to be cautious in your friendships. Who are you choosing to be friends with? We’ve got a sermon about “Friend of the World.” If you’re a friend of the world, you’re an enemy against God. Check that out: “Friend of This World.”

You need to be sure that you are around godly people. You need to be associating with others who are like yourself, those who are hungry for the Word. Those who can spur on discussion. People that are part of the body of Christ and who are strong members of the church.

What is the church? The church is the body of Christ. We’ve got a sermon called “Be The Church.” Check that out. It’s also part of a larger series that you can watch as well. The people that you’re associating with. The people that you hang around. Yhose who you call your friends or your acquaintances.

Because a lot of us, the friends we have, we can really count on one hand, but the rest of the people with whom we associate — our acquaintances or our friends — they need to be godly people.

They can’t be people that lead you astray when you’re around them. That you are tempted to do things against what the Bible says. That can’t happen if you’re around people who are seductive or who engage in wrongdoing, who lie in their life.

Maybe when you guys are together they’re not like saying, “Hey, let’s go rob the store,” or “Let’s go cheat or swindle,” or “Let’s engage in going to the strip club”, or lewd behaviors, or “Let’s harass people.”

They’re, maybe, they’re not doing that with you, but you know that that’s the type of person they are, because when you talk to them on the phone or when you see their lifestyle, there is no fruit of the Spirit manifesting in their life.

You don’t see the work of God in their life because they are not true believers in Christ. They may say they’re a Christian. They may say they go to church but do they really go to church? Are they engaging in the Bible study? Are they reading the Bible daily? Are they praying?

If you know that these people aren’t doing that, then they cannot be your friends. And I know that sounds harsh, you might say. “Well, what am I supposed to do? Just cut them out of my life?” No, you need to be a witness and lead by example.

You can talk to them on the phone but you can’t be associating with them. Don’t go stay with them. Don’t visit them. Yes, you can go visit and have coffee or something, but don’t be like, “Hey, I’m going to come. Why don’t we stay at your house for a week? Why don’t you stay at our house for a week?”

This could be very hard because maybe you’re the type of person who you’re a first-generation Christian and your parents may not be. Or your siblings may not be, but then you are and your spouse is and your children are.

And you’re reading the Word daily. You’re praying. You’re engaging in Bible study in discussion. You’re going to church. You’re part of the body of Christ, and you’re building. You’re fellowshipping with other believers.

Then over a holiday, do you take your family and go stay with those relatives or those parents who are not godly? Yes, of course you do. But you need to be careful. It needs to be limited. It needs to be sheltered.

You need to protect your children and family from the influences of ungodly people. Now of course, we are in this world, so does that mean like, “Oh, well I’m not going to let my children go to school,” or “I can’t let them go to college because colleges aren’t godly,” or “They might be a non-Christian college, or it could be a public school system, it’s not a certain type of school.”

You, of course, you’re sending your, your family out into that. You are a part of this world, but you’re not of this world. Remember Jesus says to you, “He is sending you guys out like sheep amongst wolves.”

You are in this world but you’re not of this world. So you need to be in it but not of it. It’s very very tough. Remember, are you a friend of the world or of God? Check out that sermon. If you haven’t, you can’t be misled.

If those friends or those people around you. If you know they aren’t godly people, then you need to choose different people to be around.

You remember the saying, “If you can’t change the people in your world, change the people in your world.” I know that’s tough. Or, it’s also said, “If you can’t change the people in your life, then change the people in your life.”

You need to run the other way from a lot of those people. Now I’m not saying you need to abandon them. You still need to witness to them. You need to be an example. You need to be different. But you do not throw in your lot with them.

1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character.” If you’re a Christian, you’re filled with good character and you continually associate with bad company, what’s going to happen? You will be influenced. Bad company corrupts good character.

Let’s go to Proverbs 18:24. “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” People with many companions, if they come to ruin, there are friends that are still there. The people with good characters tend to stick together.

Like I said, you could probably count your true friends on one hand. These are the people who you know you can count on in any situation, in any circumstance you can call them up, they’ll be there for you. They are the true friends.

I’m not saying that they’re going to always loan you money. Or they’re going to do this or that or this. No, they are the ones who are true friends who listen to you. Who give you advice and counsel, and you know that their judgment is sound. It’s biblical. You can count these people generally on one hand.

The rest of these people, if you encounter ruin, they may abandon you. Those are your acquaintances or friends. You need to make sure that you have more true good friends. Yes, you need to continue to witness to those who are lost.

That’s why you’re here. It’s your calling to be fruitful and multiply, to increase the Kingdom of Heaven. We’ve got a sermon on that: “Be Fruitful and Multiply.” But again, there is a large difference between throwing in your lot with those people and just witnessing to them. Let’s go to Proverbs.

Again Proverbs 1 — we’re going to read a lot of verses here, 10 to 19, Proverbs 1:10-19: “My son, if sinners entice you, do not give in to them. If they say, ‘Come along with us; let’s lie in wait for innocent blood, let’s waylay some harmless soul; let’s swallow them alive like the grave, and whole, like those who go down to the pit; we will get all sorts of valuable things and fill our houses with plunder; throw in your lot with us; we will all share the loot.’

My son, do not go along with them, do not set foot on their paths; for their feet rush into sin, they are swift to shed blood. How useless to spread a net where every bird can see it! These men lie in wait for their own blood; they waylay only themselves! Such are the ends of all who go after ill-gotten gain; it takes away the life of those who get it.”

Now you may say, “Well wait a minute, I’m not at war all the time,” or “We’re not rushing in and like bandits on the road, and get stealing from people, and beating them up and leaving them like the story of the Good Samaritan.”

You’re not doing that, but that’s — don’t take it literally. Take this not literally and metaphorically or mentally even. This is a warning to you: that if there are people around you who, you know, are not acting according to God, you don’t see the fruit in their life — you need to go the other way.

Don’t entice with them. Don’t get roped up. Don’t go into business with them. Don’t make an agreement with them. Don’t do a project with them. Because guess what? They are only going to hurt themselves.

If you strike hands in a pledge and you enter into a business agreement with someone that you know is not of good character, then what will happen? Ruin. It’s not going to go well because their bad company corrupts your good character.

They might do business a little bit shady. They might fudge paperwork or lie or rip people off here and there, and it might just be for little amounts. And so they say, “Oh, it’s no big deal.” And you might go along with it like it’s no big deal. No problem.

But guess what? It gets worse and worse and worse and then you’re roped into something. And before you know it, it could be criminal or illegal and now you’re in big trouble. Bad company corrupts good character.

Don’t even go into agreement with them. Don’t throw in your lot with them. Don’t let them entice you into something. You are a godly person and you need to behave as such.

There’s a great demonstration that if I had more room and more people, it would be cool to show you but I’m going to explain it to you because I want you to do it as a means of teaching other people how important this is.
It’s a simple demonstration. You can do this, and then you can say “All right,” now that you understand this concept go watch this sermon, or listen to this sermon when you’re driving or working out or whatever.

Get a chair, just a regular chair, not a swivel chair or something. It needs to be a safe chair you can stand on. And you stand on the chair, and then you have someone else come and stand on the floor in front of you. Grab their hand and tell them, “I’m going to pull you up onto this chair. Don’t step up here. Don’t help me in any way.”

Make sure it’s a person about your same size. You know, if you’re my age and big like this, and I’m helping a 2-year-old up onto the chair or a 5-year-old, of course, I could just pick them up with one arm and put them on the chair. That’s not the point.

It needs to be someone about your same size, your same height somewhere thereabouts or even bigger than you maybe, and try to get them up onto that chair. It’s very very difficult. But then, ask them to pull you off of the chair and see how easy that is.

You could even have someone who is half your size pull you off of the chair easier than it would be for you to get them up onto the chair. Now the point of this is, that it is very very easy to pull someone down but it’s hard to pull people up.

And so, if you think that by associating with people who are of lesser character than you, that you will be the good influence and you will change them, you’re wrong. You can’t change people. God will change them.

It’s your job to pray, to be a witness, and to continue to sow and plant seeds in their life but not associate with them. I know it’s a tough line. Because what’s going to happen is, if you start to blur that line and you’re witnessing.

You’re praying. You’re sowing seeds. You’re showing them what good character is. You’re showing them the fruits of your life, of being a godly person and they’re seeing that in you. If you go from being a character witness, and being a verbal witness, and being a person of God.

And you move across that line, and you start associating with them, that bad company will corrupt your good character and they will pull you down. Don’t blur the line. Bad company corrupts good character. If you surround yourself with ungodly people, they are going to bring you down.

Let’s go to 1 Corinthians 5:11. 1 Corinthians 5:11, “But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolator or slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat.”

This is Paul saying “Hey!” Now I know this is written towards men but it’s people. You look at different translations or newer versions and it says people. It says, “You must not associate with anyone who calls themselves a brother or sister in Christ.”

So if they say they’re a Christian or they say, “I go to church. I’m a good person,” but that person is sexually immoral, what does that mean? It means that they’re not married but they’re out having sexual relationships with multiple partners. Or they say they’re a Christian but they are homosexual instead of heterosexual.

Or they say they’re a Christian but they have a gender identity disorder where they think they’re a girl, or they think they’re a guy, or they think that they’re multiple. When really, God made them a certain way but they’re confused.

Or they think that they’re a they or a them instead of a he or a she because they want to identify as more. But they’re confused. That’s sexually immoral. It’s not the way God designed it to be. It’s immoral.

Or if they’re greedy. What is that? It means that they’re chasing money. They’re working hard. Money becomes their God and that’s what they’re after all the time. Whenever you talk to them, it’s something new.

It’s some new money problem that they have. Or it’s they want to make more money. Or they’re thinking how can they double dip. Or how can they swindle out of paying off this debt. Or how can they not pay and get it reduced.

Or can they file some type of bankruptcy. Or can they do this, or can they do that, to not have to pay what they already agreed to pay. What does that mean? It means they’re going back on their word, and they’re trying to look for a way out. That’s greed. It’s also immoral. It’s wrong.

A slanderer: are they talking bad about other people all the time? Are they complaining about other people all the time? Are they really griping? Are they always moaning and groaning about all their problems?

Are they a drunkard? Are they always high or drunk or smoking on drugs or inebriated? Are they swindling and chiseling people? Are they lying and cheating and stealing? With such people don’t even eat.

Paul is saying don’t even go near them. What he knows, that certain people are not even strong enough. Don’t even go near them. Don’t even eat with them — with people like that — depending on your level of faith and your ability of the Spirit within you.

Some of you. You need to just completely cut them off and not even be around them, period. Others, who are stronger in the faith, you can go around and be a witness, and so for those of you, this is a tough distinction. You need to know whether or not you are capable of being around them.

This could be hard. If you need guidance. Feel free to contact us. We can help you try to work through that but you need to pray and talk to God and understand who you are as a person. And if there’s anything in your life that’s just overwhelming you, or too tough.

Maybe you need to take a break from those people and focus on you. And get stronger in the faith and pray for them, that God would give them someone else in the meantime. Don’t give up on them, but strengthen yourself. Then you can help other people as well.

Proverbs 13:20 says, “Walk with the wise and become wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” If you associate with those people. They’re foolish, you will suffer harm. Walk with the wise. Choose your friends carefully and then become like them.

Let’s pray. Lord Jesus, thank you so much for this message. I pray that you would really impact the people listening or watching, and hearing this, that they would be able to instantly recognize those people in their lives, that they need to either cut off completely and just give over to you and that they would trust you with them, or those people that they know are not of you, that they need to limit their interaction with.

They may be toxic to them. They may be bad company to corrupt their good character. God help them identify those people and set the proper boundaries and help them to find wise people.

Good strong believers in their lives, so that they can fellowship with them and grow wise together with them.

That they would build each other up and strengthen each other, as the Bible says to do. Iron sharpening iron, and the word is useful for teaching, correcting, rebuking, and training in righteousness.

God, give them those righteous friends, those companions in life, the brothers and sisters in Christ. Help them grow that body, and help them reach those other people to be a good witness to them, and not to associate with them but to be witnesses to them. In Jesus’ name, amen.

I hope you take this message to heart, because it is — it’s your friends, it’s your choice. Have a great week and God bless.